


The Diaspore now called Steven

by Marble_Spider



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: #therapy for both, Accepting Connie, F/F, F/M, Gem Steven wants to be a diamond, Jasper Redemption, Major Character Undeath, Pink doesn't get away with her shit, Ressurected Pink diamond, Steven actually loves the diamonds, Steven is a fusion and we will discuss, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, White is best grandma, everyone's mad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-05-01
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:33:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23608381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marble_Spider/pseuds/Marble_Spider
Summary: Even after making peace with the Diamonds and becoming a family with them. As well as saving the galaxy Steven still feels like everyone only ever wants Pink.Alternate to: I am my MonsterOrSteven doesn't corrupt himself... he shatters.Then there were two.
Relationships: Bismuth/Pearl (Steven Universe), Blue Diamond/Yellow Diamond (Steven Universe), Connie Maheswaran/Pink Steven Universe, Connie Maheswaran/Steven Universe, Pink Steven Universe/Steven Universe, Ruby/Sapphire (Steven Universe)
Comments: 21
Kudos: 132





	1. The Shattering

**Author's Note:**

> Please read tags!! There's major stuff in the first chapter but will be lighter afterwards.
> 
> Obviously I don't own Steven Universe of things would've been different. Looking at you Mystery Girl!!!

Steven felt himself drowning in himself once more. He couldn't handle  _ this _ … the guilt. The looks on his family's faces as he told him the truth: that he  **shattered** Jasper, becoming even worse than  **Her** . 

_ Nothing _ felt right,  _ he  _ didn't feel right. 

His focus was flitting between Pearl inching towards him like a centipede, or someone trying to console a wounded animal, and the others holding back in what he presumed was fear. 

'More like terror.' He thought as Pearl inched closer.

Was it because he was wounded? Damaged? A broken reflection of the diamond that once was. After all, only half of him was actually real. The other.. the other wasn't  **his** . Gems were made, they weren't born like him. He had memories that weren't his own. Sometimes he even had to remember that the feeling of nostalgia he got wasn't even from him but  **Her** and he  _ hated it _ . 

He didn't _want_ **Her** memories, only his own: sixteen years worth of failures and celebrations wrapped up in a complex half-gem. 

Steven watched as Pearl pulled on his arm towards her, more than likely to try and initiate a hug, while his thoughts swirled in his head. His gem giving off a vibrating hum of annoyance, matching his mind in its frequency only to wail in inhuman ear screeching defiance that broke all the glass and ceramics around them. The wooden floorboards snapped and submitted to their will. They seemed to be the only things willing to do so as he felt the gems and his father envelope him in the annoying hug.

He faintly registered the strain on his father's face and the blood trickling out of his ears as the hum of his gem only grew. 

The thoughts in his head replaying wanting to shatter White,  _ needing to shatter her. _ It was like the beat of a drum or the whispers of a long faded lullaby from his past and it didn't make any sense. They were fine now. The Diamonds had come down for every major human tradition since he'd met them and had even mistaken a few irrelevant ones as being important: namely grandparents day. 

He still didn't know how they had found out but it was White's favorite day because it was the one day that he was willing to put down his schedule and be with his Nana. Unfortunately she didn't understand that the day itself changed with each year, or that it was a yearly thing at all, so they had kept celebrating it on the same day every month after: the twenty-third. Which had gotten him more than a few odd looks when he had to explain why she was so insistent that she got her way during their outings. 

He even got along great with Blue and Yellow. Both of whom were still annoyed that they didn't get a human granted day with their nephew so they ended up making one up for each of them. Steven had figured out quite quickly that they weren't capable of sharing him with the other when White got him all to herself for her day. Spinel even tagged along sometimes or just came down to hang out in general.

The Diamonds had been especially good at apologizing for their issues and for ripping out his gem, keeping him captive, blaming him for Pink dying, and for all the other gems that had tried to kill him over the years. So much so that he eventually had to tell them to stop because he wasn't mad at them anymore. Which was the _truth._ He had long since forgiven them for their actions… 

So why did he just want to shatter White?

  
  


Jasper though… Jasper was a mistake,  _ shattering her  _ was a mistake. 

His breathing became erratic as more blood came out of his father's ears, ever so slowly dripping onto the floorboards and seeping into the ground below.

Time slowed before he finished the thought of leaving to protect them from himself. He pulled out of their incurable hug and was out the door before the realization of what was happening even graced itself upon Garnet's face, her shades long dematerialized from moments before.

He wasn't even sure where he was going, but is there really ever a real destination for someone who was already lost? 

He briefly caught a glimpse of Connie and Lion on the front lawn. He didn't remember calling her, then again he didn't  _ actually _ remember tons of things he already knew. Time slowed as his lungs became heavy and the need to breathe outweighed his need to escape.

Somehow he found himself at exactly where he didn't want to be: in front of Bismuth's shop in Little Homeworld, right in front of Lapis, Peridot, Bismuth and for some reason Jasper. All of whom seemed to be arguing about  _ something  _ that he didn't  _ really _ want to know about. He had his own problems. The current one being the need to breathe, second to not having to deal with other people's issues for more than five minutes.

"Steven? What's wrong? Why are you so out of breath?"

Images of a Lazuli with light blue hair laughing at something he said flashed in his mind as this one questioned him.

Bismuth tried to put a consoling hand on his shoulder, "Steven, just slow down your breathing. Whatever happened is going to be alright. I promise. Lets just call Pearl and-"

"No! I can't go back there!"

"Alright, alright, why don't you just tell us what happened huh? I think you'll find that the B-team, and possibly Jasper, can help you out just as well." The snide Peridot reminded him of someone else just as familiar. 

How many of them had given him updates throughout the eons? No. Not him. These weren't  **his** memories.

"No. You can't. It's not… I'm not _broken_ I'm just not **ME**. Only half of me is real and the other half…"

His chest felt so tight it made his vision blur. His gem vibrated in him with whispers of consolement only to fall on deaf ears.

**((That's not true. You know that's not true. White proved it herself.))**

"Is that… his gem? Is it talking? Peridot how is that possible?"

"I'm not sure but we need his breathing to even out. Human biology is a very fragile thing and if he keeps going… it could be bad."

"Um guys? Not to be a bother but-" 

"NOT NOW BISMUTH!"

"I know that you're trying to help him but if you would just listen to me then I think-"

"Bismuth I say this in the nicest way possible SHUT UP AND LET US HELP STEVEN OR I WILL DROWN YOU IN THE POOL FOR AN HOUR!"

He needs them to stop.  _ Now. _ There's too much noise. He can't do this. He can't  _ be this.  _ He can't be what they want. He knows that they only love him because of  **Her** . That every time they looked at him they were just missing  **Her** . 

**((No! Stop it. That isn't true!))**

Sometimes he wished he could just start over somewhere. Anywhere that wasn't here or Homeworld. Connie was going to that campus soon. Maybe he could follow her? He could make it a road trip. ...No. That wasn't fair to her. He couldn't drag her down with him. She was  **good** . She was  _ so  _ **good** and he…  _ wasn't _ . He had inherited war crimes and thoughts that weren't his own. He didn't know how to make friends or hardly anything about school. He didn't even know what summer  _ was  _ according to kids until he met her.

**((It wasn't our fault. None of it was our fault.** **_We_ ** **didn't do anything.** **_We didn't know anything_ ** **.))**

"THAT'S THE POINT! IT WASN'T OUR FAULT but I…  _ we _ did something worse than her. We  _ shattered  _ Jasper and then brought her back like everything would just go back to normal but it's NOT!" 

"What?!" Bismuth exclaimed in a tidal wave of shock. Her voice resembled the same sound as the boulders smashing against the Earth just before the final blow struck.

"What do you mean you shattered Jasper?!" Peridot's high pitched squeals of disdain echoed around him and made him instantly remember Pearl's own reaction.

"She looks _fine_ to me. ...Wait, you **shattered** her?!"

He couldn't see. It hurt. Everything hurt. His lungs felt like they were on fire. His feet felt locked in place. His heart was jackhammering inside of his chest trying to tell him something but it was hard to focus.

_ He couldn't see…. _

Something was under his shirt tickling him on the way down like a large bug had gotten stuck. Then it was gone, only to be replaced by a smaller one. Then another, and another, and another.

_ He couldn't breathe… _

Distantly he recognized the voices around him screaming for something but he didn't know what. He didn't care to ask. Everything was black. Nothing mattered except the incessant bugs that kept falling out of his shirt and onto the awaiting grass and the anguished wail they gave off as they left. He wished they would shut up and go away.

_ …And then he was gone. _

* * *

Jasper watched her small diamond scream in anguish over the imaginary things inside of his head while only wishing that she could fight whatever was causing him such distress. 

She watched as the Lazuli, and the Peridot argued over how to help him while the Bismuth watched on with worry and got shot down every time she tried to give some input.

She  _ felt it  _ when her diamond started to shatter right in front of her eyes. She screamed when she saw the first shard fall to the ground. Bolted towards it with enough force to knock down a tree only to catch herself from toppling him.

Moments after as she was painstakingly catching the shards that fell she somehow knew that all of the gems that followed or cared for her diamond felt his shattering as well.

As she was screaming for the Bismuth to assist, for Peridot and Lapis to do something,  _ anything  _ to help him, her tears were silently falling. The Bismuth acted as she asked, spurring from her stupor like an odd reboot, catching the small diamond in her arms so that his physical form didn't hit the ground.

" _ Please _ do something! Peridot  _ fix  _ him! Fix our diamond!"

"I can't… I don't know… I… I.."

Jasper wasn't sure what came over Lazuli. Whether it was watching her diamond fall in front of her or if she now resolved anguish with anger but she was grateful as the water gem turned to the technician and took control.

"Peridot focus! Steven is dying. His organic half is shutting down and we need to stop it so that we can save his gem! Now how do we do it? You must have something in the shop. I KNOW you."

* * *

Jasper was barely hanging on as she watched the rest of her diamond's gem fall into her awaiting hands, only focusing on it and making sure Bismuth was still holding onto his physical form. 

Peridot's footsteps frantically left only to return shortly after. 

The click above her doesn't fully register as a thing she should concern herself with until Peridot says her diamond's organic half is stable, only then does she will herself to move away from his almost lifeless body with his shattered gem carefully sheltered in her hands. 

She sees his body be picked up and cradled like an organic infant in the Bismuth's arms before she can think to protest only to stop herself before the thought can cross her lips. 

'The Bismuth won't harm him. I have his gem, she has his body. That's enough.'

"What did you do? What are those?" The Lazuli questioned from somewhere around her.

Jasper could only focus on the shards in her hands, _the ones_ _he needed to live._ The reply that the Peridot gives is lost to her as her mind swirls with uncertainties and dread.

"We need to take him to a hospital. We need to get his gem fixed. He can't survive on those things for long!" She hears Bismuth scream at the other while her ears start to fill with ringing silence.

Bickering ensued: where to go, how to help him,  _ if they could help him _ , if he was a lost cause because there were even some things diamonds couldn't escape and death was one of them.

"The reef. We go to the reef. Pearls were brought there to be fixed all the time; maybe it can help him too." The voice that comes out of her throat isn't her own. It's cracked and rough with guilt and tears. 

She didn't recognize it as her own but  _ knows  _ it is. 

More bickering circled around her: Lazuli pointed out that the reef was destroyed only for Peridot to counter that she fixed it and had reported it to Steven awhile ago.

Bismuth was the deciding factor as she silently walked towards the warp pad and waited with what looked to be a mix of irritation and grief, yelling at them to get a move on when they stayed frozen for too long.

* * *

The cold blue landscape of the reef was eerie as they walked through it. Oddly enough the Peridot was the fastest among them, steamrolling ahead and only glancing back to see if they followed as an afterthought of frantic bursts of speed. Jasper heard Shell speak with Peridot on her diamond's status which both seemed to access was viable. 

The seemingly endless hallway they found themselves in eventually opened up into what looked like a gallery with holographic Pearls on display for the elites' choosing as well as the many accessories they could be given for entertainment purposes in lieu of a weapon. 

Jasper didn't think  _ any of them  _ were good enough for her diamond.

From what the Peridot stated Steven's gem wasn't actually viable anymore but the code inside of it was and could be extracted and put into an artificial pearl then reattached to his organic half which would hopefully make him work again. 

Jasper only understood that her diamond's gem would now be a pearl and that they were hoping he would get better after it was done. The fact that his gemstone would have to change honestly meant nothing to her now, the code that Jasper responded to would still be in it. The body that Jasper had come to know would still be alive and healthy. 

_ Steven would be healthy. _

She no longer cared for or acknowledged that Pink Diamond was her Diamond, not since she had learned the truth two years ago. Now she often referred to Pink as The Betrayer and nothing more, not that anyone else knew that.

* * *

Lapis Lazuli watched in absolute horror as Bismuth put Steven's body down on the flat new pedestal that Peridot had asked Shell to bring up only for a dome to encase him in a film-like shield. 

She listened as Peridot explained that she had created the surface to act as a health pod she had seen humans use on television, except that this one actually worked, and that now that he was in there there was no need for the oxygen and heart rate bracelets to stay attached to his wrists but that she would remove them later as time was of the essence.

She didn't fully understand what was happening until the gem shards were placed in a small box-like containment unit near his body and Shell was asking which gem should be used as a replacement. 

There was only one thing that Lapis knew for certain if they actually went through with the plan: they were all going to be shattered,  **permanently** .

"We can't! We can't take away his status as a diamond! It's wrong! It's… it's not… done."

* * *

**< Please select your new Pearl from the options available. The customization options will appear after initial selection. Do not worry about your Pearl's physical appearance as all internal code can be changed to fit the owner's desires.>**

"Lapis I know it's terrifying but it's the  _ only  _ option we have of getting Steven back! Technically he'll still  _ be _ a Diamond as his organic form is the one containing all of the data for his abilities. The only thing we're doing is giving him a new key to unlock those abilities so that he can live! I've analyzed his genetic coding three times to confirm."

**< Please select your new Pearl from the options available. The customization options will appear after initial selection. Do not worry about your Pearl's physical appearance as all internal code can be changed to fit the owner's desires.> ** The oddly calming voice of Shell rang out as the seemingly ever present bickering started up once more.

"Guys I know you're worried and I hate to point out the obvious but  _ we don't have time for this. We need to-"  _

**< Please select your new Pearl from the options available. The customization options will appear after initial selection. Do not worry about your Pearl's physical appearance as all internal code can be changed to fit the owner's desires.>**

  
  


"ENOUGH!!" Jasper's voice echoed throughout the halls and made the flimsy toy-like accessories shake in their stands. It took everything in her to not break a few of the pillars in her current fury.

"Insolent echo! Do you have any other options available besides Pearls? These all look too weak to be considered my diamond's true gem."

**< I currently have two options available for your selection. Several Era Two Pearls from the Delta kindergarten originally designed to assist White Diamond and an Era One DIASPORE.>**

"What exactly is a Diaspore?"

* * *

"Diaspore? Oh! I thought those were all destroyed in the beginnings of Era Two! This is fascinating. I wonder how many other gems have been-"

"PERIDOT!"

"Oh! Right… sorry. The Diaspore gems were the original Pearls however most were destroyed during the cleansing before Era Two kicked off due to a major design flaw. While the gems were great for entertainment value they couldn't be used for much else because they had to be made in couples. Well, more accurately, they were two halves of a whole gem forcefully cut apart in order to entertain more guests. Due to that fact they couldn't leave the other's side. The most they could manage to move away from each other was about six feet until their odd magnetism pulled them back together again."

"Gems aren't made to be cut in half like that. The poor Diaspore was forced to operate two gems at once and just couldn't handle the strain. The more dominant of the two was called Zultanite.

Which of course made the second half, Csarite, turn more holographic as time went on which eventually caused them to go insane."

"However this was eventually patched at the end of Era One when their production was altered: the Zultanite gem was used as the source and the Csarite gem was put on the weapon itself and kept inside of the Zultanite for protection to be used as an extra life you could say. They were soon destroyed though due to pearls being more in demand." 

"It's perfect." A satisfied smirk could be heard in the fighters' voice.

* * *

"No, it's dangerous! Jasper we can't-" Lapis started only for everything in her to run cold when she heard the twin bracelets chime.

_ [Ten minutes until organic life fails. Decomposition eminent.] _

"No time!" Bismuth screamed. "Shell, we choose the Diaspore just do whatever you need to to make sure that Steven's gem code goes into both of them!"

**< Improbable. The organic half contains alternate coding than the gem counterpart and does not contain as many base memories. In order to fix this issue the organic would have to change its appearance to match the new gem. There is also the matter of the extra memories in the gem half. In order to fix this the recommendation is->**

"-JUST FIX HIM!" All four gems yelled in unison.

* * *

Peridot placed both pieces of the Diaspore in its side of the container and waited. Her feet tapped with so much impatience that she was wondering why no one, namely Jasper, had yelled at her yet to cease the infernal racket. It seemed however that each gems' attention was only focused on one person in particular: the boy in the pod who had saved them all. 

She was surprised when Shell injected Steven's previous gem coding that the new one began repairing itself. It pulled itself together again only to spit a smaller piece back out. Anyone watching could tell they weren't cut correctly. That is until the larger Diaspore eventually formed into an odd rounded triangle, much like a taller version of her own gem, while the other became much more condensed and formed a narrow diamond shape. 

She supposed that it had something to do with his healing ability and it made sense for some of it to still be inside of the gem itself… she just didn't take it into account. 

The fluttering of water wings could be heard behind her as she imagined Lapis spreading them in equal anticipation as Peridot opened the side of the canister with Steven's gems and was in awe when the smaller of the two floated out on its own in front of her.


	2. The Grief of Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gems in Steven's life learn the truth.

White Diamond was just finishing up the last touches of her new human outfit: a low cut purple top with a belt around the middle, black pants and her signature black pumps when she felt her world shatter. Something was horribly  _ wrong _ , she just didn't know what. 

Nevertheless she had a day to spend with her adorable grandson Rigel. She only had to do one more thing to complete her look: rotating her gem to make it resemble his own. She had found that humans were much less weary of her when she didn't have a giant "horn" sticking out of her head. She always saved it for last due to the shrinking portion of it. Even after almost three years of changing back and for she still wasn't used to the slight dizziness it caused afterwards.

Her hair changed from white to a cloudy grey and billowed around her back like an oncoming storm cloud while she completed the change now only a mere five-nine. She was only a few inches taller than Steven at his five-six. 

She was just about to announce her departure, subsequently shooing away the nagging feeling of grief, when her sisters burst into her room with twin faces of despair. 

"Well I know that you two are jealous that you don't get to spend time with Steven but I'll remind you that he told you both that next week you could each go to Earth and spend time with him. Honestly, it's nothing to lose your form over girls. Now that reminds me… where did I put that toy rabbit?"

"White." Yellow started from the doorway. Quickly finding herself unable to continue. White had been right after all: she was doing everything she could to keep herself together.

"Now Yellow remember: in this form I'm Nana Blanche, especially around Rigel. You know, from that tv show Steven and Connie like so much… Oh what was it called? Something golden? Or? Oh well, no matter I know I put that rabbit here somewhere."

White pointedly ignored her sisters. Her quest to find Steven's new stuffed bunny more prevalent on her mind. She started rummaging through the multiple chests she had lying around her room only to just as quickly move to another in impatience.

"White…" The grief Blue felt… She never thought she could feel it worse than those eons of missing Pink. Yet here she was trying to keep her tears at bay so that she wouldn't control others. It was so much worse now.. the grief. Her hands shook as she tried to continue and she could barely stand. Ever thankful that Yellow was standing beside her with her elbow out as a small stable point to focus her thoughts as she grasped it.

"Oh and I need to go to the library before I leave. Steven said he wanted a few more books to read in gem glyph. I think I'll get him 'Gulliver and Pollux's Adventures on Mars', as well as, 'Hematite's Blacksmiths of Time book three: Bandit of Time' where Hematite has to go back in time two thousand years ago during the Battle of Brusmar to find her lost love Scorcamite only to find out that she's been working with the enemy the entire time. It's a very thrilling tale. Although I should probably get him some newly updated history books from the other gems' points of view…" White trailed off as she kept digging in the same box over and over.

It was only when Spinel coughed behind her that she directed her attention towards the others. They really were worse for wear. Yellow was holding onto the door frame so tightly that it was cracking under the pressure and if gems had bones then she was sure that her elbow would be doing the same from how Blue was clinging to it. 

They were standing so close together White could've sworn they were about to fuse. Not that it would be the first time they had done so… She couldn't remember how many times she had walked in on them being Green Diamond after they had done it the first time under her and Steven's watchful eyes. Honestly they very rarely  _ were _ Blue and Yellow anymore. She had long thought they'd be a permafusion like Garnet and was more than willing to show and tell them of her acceptance over it which she very often did. Honestly the only time they unfused nowadays was when they were worried about Steven.

"Oh look I found his new bunny!" White commented with her head buried in a chest.

"W- White…" Spinel snivelled out.

It was the only thing she paused for. After Steven and Spinel had come into her life she found that she couldn't say no to them, unless it was dangerous of course, nor could she ignore them. 

It was like they were their own planets with their own gravity pulling her along to do their bidding. Spinel the rainbow and Steven the brightest star, even when compared to diamonds. It was where they got their nicknames from, Rainbow for Spinel, and Rigel for Steven after he commented that she and Green were like a constellation: bright and demanding attention with their elegance. It only seemed fitting that his nickname be the biggest star from his favorite constellation that could be seen from Earth's surface.

She looked up from her successful hunt at the little gems' face and saw that she somehow looked even worse than Blue and Yellow, "Oh Spinel what's wrong? Would you like to come with? I'm sure Steven wouldn't mind."

"N- No. Steven… St- Steven is… is…" Tears erupted from the little gems' face like an overflowing fountain. 

White positioned herself to sit and opened her arms in comfort for her Rainbow just in time to catch her. It was times like these that her Rainbow often reminded her of a small human child demanding attention from their parents. She cooed and shushed the other in an effort to calm her woes. While her arms subconsciously took to making a small rocking motion she had seen mothers for their fretful young. Dutifully ignoring the tears and snot that threatened to ruin her new top.

"What on Homeworld is going on? Why are you all so upset?" 

"Steven shattered. He's gone White." Yellow's voice rang out like a bell she had heard from one of those brick buildings with colorful glass she had seen humans flock around every so often. She recalled that Steven had called them churches.

"No… that's- that's not possible. We would know. We would  _ know  _ if he…  _ I would… _ "

Did she though? There was that awful feeling of dread she had been feeling all morning. Was that it? Had her gem known before her emotions that Steven was  _ gone _ on her favorite day of the month?

If it was…. Then whoever took him from them would  **pay** .

* * *

Pearl was doing laundry as something to do with her hands. Garnet had  _ just  _ stopped her doing another round of stress baking. Pearl muttered to herself while she worked and did her best to ignore Amethyst's pacing, a new habit she had picked up.

She did her best to ignore the nagging feeling of  _ wrongness  _ she was feeling as she worried about Steven. Not to mention the fact that Bismuth wasn't home yet and they had a date in thirty minutes. The gem was very rarely late to their outings now after seeing how much it meant to Pearl to be early. Early being the lax term of what it once was that is. Somehow the blacksmith had managed to get Pearl to concede to being only thirty minutes early to anything they planned which was much better than the near three hours they had been doing.

Thirty minutes early… Bismuth  _ knew  _ the cut off. Which meant that she was now late for being early which only made Pearl find more things to do as she seethed in a mix of worry and frustration.

_ Something was wrong.  _

She could feel it. 

* * *

Garnet sat on the couch cataloguing every scenario she had had with Steven up until that very point in time trying to understand why he was having these outbursts. Why he would shatter Jasper. Why he felt like he had to shatter White when they got along so well now.

The ebb and flow of time moved along the inside of her mind as she looked into his future from after his latest outburst. Him running out, finding himself at Little Homeschool. She saw Lapis, Bismuth, Peridot and Jasper arguing on where Jasper was going to stay since Steven didn't want her living in her odd enclosure. She watched as Steven argued with himself like he was two people. As she was only able to hear the one on the outside she only heard half of the conversation… until it changed.

His gem spoke. It tried to console him and ease his fears. It sounded just as terrified as he did, just as guilty. For what she wasn't sure. Jasper's shattering she supposed. They had both mentioned it. They had screamed it at the other in fact. 

The human claiming they were wrong. Not about their actions but as a being they were wrong. The gem disagreed and tried to remind the other that they weren't. That they were loved but the human wasn't listening. Then something happened the human half became still and grasped his own hair like a lifeline while the gem… 

The gem screamed in agony. Garnet had never heard something so horrible and she had lived for over five thousand years. It just kept screaming while the human did  _ nothing _ . 

Garnet knew that the human could understand the gem. She had just watched them argue over their existence so why was he doing nothing?

She watched in horror as the gem kept screaming in agony.

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**Make it stop.**

**.**

**_Please…._ **

Jasper caught onto what was happening long before Garnet did.

She didn't want to believe it as the gem begged for its life… 

As it shattered and fell into the Quartz's shivering hands…

As Bismuth caught the stockstill human…

Watched as the light started to fade from his eyes as the gem  _ kept shattering _ ….

With a pop Garnet unraveled. 

Sapphire let out an agonizing wail and grasped at her eye.

Tried to shield it from the truth. 

_ Tried to forget what she saw. _

Ruby… Ruby was lost. 

Sapphire couldn't see anything past that point. Past Steven shattering,  _ dying _ , and Ruby didn't know what to do.

Her flames caught her part of the couch on fire as the other side turned to ice. She felt the purple blanket behind her start to turn to ash. Heard Pearl shriek in the distance, demanding to know what was wrong.

She heard Sapphire shrieking in pain and knew that nothing else mattered.

_ Steven was gone. _

* * *

Amethyst was pacing. An annoying habit she had somehow picked up from Steven and Pearl. Well Steven had picked it up from Pearl  _ first.  _ What was that saying? Like mother, like son. Yeah. That was it! 

She supposed that Pearl had become Steven's mother over the years. He had even started calling her that every now and then in the past two years since he'd started calling White, Nana. 

Amethyst thought it was hilarious. At first Pearl was horrified and had an actual panic attack over it. Atleast that's what Connie said it was anyway. Amethyst just called it panic mode.

It was even more hilarious when Bismuth caught on and started teasing him about calling her Mama Bismuth which would make Pearl giggle like the lovestruck idiot she was. Which was the  _ only  _ time Pearl was an idiot. Even White praised her intelligence sometimes.

Today though, today Amethyst was pacing because Pearl was stress folding and Garnet was a freaking statue on the couch.

That is until she  _ wasn't. _

The next thing Amethyst knew Sapphire was screaming like someone had died and Ruby was burning the couch.

"Sapphire! Sapphire calm down! Tell us what happened! ….Ruby please!!" Pearl pleaded with them.

It was a small admission compared to Sapphire's screams. 

Amethyst had barely heard it over the noise of the warp pad going off. 

She barely registered it as she saw the absolute grief on the Diamond's and Spinel's faces. 

As the door opened to Gregg and Connie came through asking what was going on.

But she  _ did  _ hear it. They all did.

The reason for Sapphire's screams, for Spinel's snot running down her face, for the Diamond's constant shivering and closeness to practically fusing.

Ruby's small admission of truth: Steven had shattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We'll get back to the Reef in the next chapter!!


	3. The Two Halves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The two halves of Steven wake up and react in different ways. 
> 
> Jasper tries to reconcile with her Diamond.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Important notes for this chapter:
> 
> Name pronunciations: (how I do it)
> 
> Coeus - KEY - OSE
> 
> Polus - POLE - US
> 
> Name meanings:
> 
> Coeus was the Greek version of one of the titan sons born from the God Uranus, god of Sky, and the Goddess Gaia, the Earth 
> 
> While Polus was his Roman variation and was the axis that the heavens revolved around

Polus reformed in a panic. He wasn't supposed to be… out. 

Exposed… 

Where was his organic half? 

He looked around, ignoring the other gems' own panic induced worry, and searched. Why couldn't he see out of the others' eyes?

His gem hummed from his stomach in outrage. The ground cracked under the weight of his rage once more. Only this time he didn't have Coeus, his human-half, to calm him down.

"Steven _please_ calm down!" Lapis said as she moved towards him.

**"Not Steven."** The gem replied in an eerie monotone fashion. 

**"Where?"** His gemsong rang out and shattered the lights on the walls.

"Where what?" Bismuth cautiously asked.

**"Where is Coeus?"**

Polus's gemsong warped into a lull of piano keys that asked the same question over and over.

* * *

The song kept getting warped as the seconds passed by and no one answered, more frantic for its other half to respond. Bismuth knew what he was doing. It was an old way of speaking. Most gems didn't even know how to do it anymore unless they were taught. She herself didn't know how to and neither did the other Crystal Gems that she knew of. They had no need to since they had translated it into writing and learned how to adapt to other languages.

Bismuth tried to get her gem to answer back, she didn't know where or who this Coeus was but she could help. 

She fought the urge to sigh when nothing happened from her gem only to hear what sounded like wind chimes except that it wasn't _from_ her.

* * *

"Jasper?" Lapis questioned from across from her, "How do you know how to do that?"

  
  


Jasper heard the pain coming from her Diamond's gem that was searching, _longing_ for its other half. So she responded instead hoping it would calm instead of enrage him. 

After all who was she to assume the role of a Diamond?

"All of my gemkind are taught how to do this to calm our Diamonds or commanders in the heat of battle." She replied to the Lazuli.

The moment her Diamond's eyes caught sight of her gem and knew it was her sending the message of peace she saw nothing but absolute fury in his eyes. His body though, was swaying with the lull she emitted like a snake ready to strike at any moment if anygem got too close.

With that in mind Jasper slowly made her way towards the small Diamond who, upon getting closer wasn't _actually_ that small anymore.

Once she got close enough she pulled her Diamond towards her and tried to put him to sleep with her song. She knew it was a cheap tactic but it was obvious that he didn't know control and she couldn't have him destroying the place. Atleast not while they were inside and possible collateral damage.

She was surprised when he allowed himself to be held, allowed them to lower themselves to the floor and sit. She was even more surprised when he curled up in her arms and just silently watched.

It was then that Jasper took notice of the physical changes in her Diamond's stature: he was indeed taller than normal, like he was the sparring version of himself: the one she helped create. His eyes had been pure black diamond pupils instead of oval. His hair was the same brown shade as the one Steven called "My Dad" and his skin was a bit paler.

Her Diamond's frantic song finally slowed down to something masquerading as peace after they were settled on the ground. Jasper wasn't fooled though and made sure to keep hers going. She knew with every bit of light that currently made up her form that even though her Diamond currently _seemed_ peaceful he could change his tune in a millisecond if he so chose to. His blank expression wasn't helping matters on what he was thinking either.

The boy sitting in her lap wasn't the same one she had trained just days ago and had broken down in front of them that morning. This one was a falsely wrapped promise of love and affection with the instinct to protect what was his or kill if he couldn't and the temper to do it.

She had sensed it in Steven during their so called lessons. This one was the one that she had befriended. This one was the one who had stubbornly kept coming back to her territory and refused to budge. Had tried to get her to make _friends_. 

_This one_ was the one who had lost control and shattered her. Not that she blamed him. He must have been so bored with not being able to express his power that he had _forgotten_ what it was like to use it. She could hear in his song how sorry he was for it. It flowed out and twisted with the question like a sad lullaby.

She let her own tune echo out reassurances and understanding. Promises of more thinly veiled lessons that she stubbornly hoped would lead to actual friendship.

She was so focused on listening and responding to it that she hadn't realized the mushy organic one had finally awoken.

* * *

Coeus, previously the human half of Steven Cutiepie ~~Quartz~~ Diamond-Universe, woke up with a loud gasp of air after what seemed like a millenia. 

He really _really_ hoped it wasn't.

His eyes couldn't seem to focus on one thing, like his vision was being pulled in two different directions. No. Not different _directions,_ just different perspectives.

One half was looking at the wall in front of him and Peridot in his side view while the other was looking _at_ him.

He sat up slowly with Peridot's help and tried to chirp out a small bit of gemsong to his other half as a reflex only to remember he didn't _have_ a gem because Polus _was_ his gem. Except that just like the million other times they had had a purely harmonic conversation the sounds of a guitar echoed out and wrapped around the sounds of the piano like a long lost friend welcoming them home.

Coeus stilled. 'How was he able to answer back?'

* * *

After taking advantage of the disruption the odd Stevenesque gem was creating Peridot had successfully placed the remaining artificial gem in Steven's body which thankfully didn't reject it. She honestly wasn't sure what she would've done if his body had rejected it.

She helped him sit up after he awoke and listened in awe to the melody that played out of his gem doing what Jasper's couldn't fully do: actually calming the terrifying silent fury of a Diamond.

"I had to give you an artificial gem in order to replace your previous one. It just so happened to come in two parts." She replied to his unasked question that was apparent on his face.

* * *

Coeus kept his song going until Polus's song stopped and only his and Jasper's could be heard.

He momentarily wondered why Jasper kept going until he somehow felt Polus' rage inside of him. He didn't know how the gem _felt_ this much. It felt like he was going to choke from it if he kept feeling it. 

It seemed with a mere thought that the emotions went away just as suddenly as they had come and he wasn't sure which of them had done it but he was grateful.

'Totally get why Jasper hadn't stopped yet.'

It was odd seeing his gem half so… calm. He knew it was false but to a random stranger it wouldn't look it. Then again he honestly wasn't sure if Polus was just constantly angry at this point. It would make sense if he _was_ from what he had learned over the years.

After the first time, as Steven, Coeus had tried to communicate with the gem half. It had taken **months** to get it right and be able to even understand the other. He'd had to learn a whole other language after all… but eventually they had learned how to communicate. 

Coeus had learned that Polus was the tiny voice of Pink's that actually _wanted_ to be a Diamond. He had wanted to please the others and control his own planet but was repeatedly shot down by her and then again by Coeus.

He had learned that Polus was just in love with Connie as Coeus was but that he didn't really like the whole kissing aspect. After all to a gem kisses were exchanged as a means of getting quick important data from one another and not for repeated uses unless you already shared every thought together.

The surprising thing to both of them was their differentiating tastes in entertainment: Polus was actually the one who enjoyed the laid back romance movies and books, besides the kissing, and Coeus liked the action or mystery ones with both of them having a love/hate relationship for sci-fi only to reconcile over their love of fantasy.

Polus loved sea turtles and ketchup while Coeus preferred mustard and mayonnaise but also loved sea turtles.

While Coeus thought he was too old for all the stuffed animals Nana Blanche constantly gave him Polus hid them away in the small crevices of their room and hoped that Coeus wouldn't get rid of them. Which had eventually prompted them to be stored in their closet when Polus got the bright idea to expand his hiding spots to outside of their room and into every other room in the house.

There was one loose panel in the ceiling of the bathroom that was a particular favorite of his and Coeus had lost count how many times the other gems had yelled at him for stuffing new ones up there only to be bombarded with a hoard of them when they got to be too much weight for the panel. 

He was pulled out of his thoughts when he felt something pulling at him. When he looked up however the only one close to him was Peridot who was anxiously hovering and more than likely anticipating him falling. Lapis and Bismuth were keeping a watchful eye on Polus and Jasper who were at least five feet away.

"Peridot I'm fine. I _feel_ fine. Great even which is weird. I mean I should be tired right? Considering… but I feel _fine_." He reassured the small gem who currently seemed smaller than normal.

Did he… grow? Polus did seem bigger than normal but he thought it was just because the gem was sitting down and Jasper _was_ pretty tall herself.

Coeus looked at his gem first and found that it was quite similar to Peridot's own but in a dark grey and taller. He knew she had said he got a new gem but seeing was believing he supposed. His skin seemed a bit redder too, like he had a sunburn and after seeing himself through Polus's eyes he knew they both shared the same diamond shaped pupils.

Worry gripped at him like a snake and threatened to overtake him as he thought that Connie wouldn't want to be with him anymore. He wasn't Steven, not really. He was only half of the person she fell in love with.

The tugging became more insistent as his worry increased. He didn't realize he had walked himself over to Polus and Jasper until he felt Polus pull him down to the ground with them with a purr-like hum from his gem. His own gem responded with a longer variant and reminded him of a cat that had just woken up.

Polus reached out his hands to Coeus with a silent request of contact of which he instantly accepted. He wasn't sure if it was reality catching up to them or lack of sleep but their eyes both became heavy the second their hands clasped the other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes I know they didn't explain their names and why they chose them. This was supposed to be a conversation between gem and human half with a bit of understanding and acceptance from Jasper.
> 
> Current relationships for the "twins":
> 
> Coeus:  
> Loves - Connie, Humans/gems he considers family  
> Tolerates - Polus  
> Dislikes - Jasper
> 
> Polus:  
> Loves - Connie, Humans/gems he considers family  
> Tolerates - Coeus  
> Likes - Jasper  
> Dislikes - Pink Diamond


	4. Not a chapter, just an update/asks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Update for story and asks

Okay so this was originally supposed to be like 5 chapters but I think I have 8 planned out so far. Eventually there will be a time skip, which will most likely be after chapter 7.

However I don't think I can write this anymore without Stevencest, sorry for those who want to dip out now. No it won't be explicit, because I suck at that but it will be there. They will also both be in a relationship with Connie albeit as different aspects. 

Also I am trying to make it more descriptive because I feel like it's not.

The real chapter 4 should be out within the next few days. It's taken me awhile because it wasn't planned at all!!

Last thing: if anyone would like to see a certain scene/chapter in this story then let me know in the comments!!

Thanks for reading,

Marble


	5. The Pearly Whites Predicament

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Universe twins come home and for some reason Polus is emotionally attached to his teeth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly don't know where most of this chapter came from. Sorry it took so long.
> 
> I kinda hate it??

Bismuth couldn't believe it when the human-half of Steven practically fell onto the other one then both instantly fell asleep. Thereby leaving Jasper trapped and looking just as confused as herself over the situation. 

"Now what?" Lapis asked from behind her.

Bismuth momentarily ignored her question in favor of allieving Jasper of one of the Steven's curled up in her lap. While it didn't look like either of them would wake up anytime soon she didn't get the feeling that the human half would appreciate waking up in the bigger Quartz's lap.

'He's not actually a Quartz.' She bitterly reminded herself as she picked up the black haired boy.

She was trying to figure out if they should just leave or wait for the boys to wake up in order to answer Lapis's question. After all, what  _ were  _ they going to do? Would they even be able to get Steven back? The boys didn't seem like they knew how to do anything without being the fusion. They oddly reminded her of Garnet in the early years: constantly wanting to be together and not even needing words to communicate. 

It was nice and if she were being honest with herself she'd say she was jealous. She wanted that with Pearl. Well maybe not to  _ that _ extent but she at least wanted to fuse. She understood the other gems' point of view of course but still secretly hoped that she'd want to… eventually. 

With a huff she reminded herself that they had time and that she was just being impatient. They had  _ just _ started seeing each other after all.

"Okay," she started while turning towards her companions, "We're gonna go back to Earth and put them in their bed then we're going to  _ calmly  _ explain to Pearl and the other Diamonds what happened."

___________________________________________

"Hopefully none of them shatter us for taking away his Diamond status." Peridot muttered under her breath.

It seemed like a solid plan. The Stevens' were obviously tired if they were willing to fall asleep on  _ Jasper, _ and beds were comfy. She couldn't help but feel like they were missing something though. She knew she had to get some of her equipment from hers' and Lapis' place to check if the new gems would stay stable. Sure Shell had said they would but she wanted to double, maybe triple check. This was  _ Steven  _ they were talking about after all.

Peridot tapped her foot with worry over the something that was eluding her when she caught sight of something small on the ground. It looked like a piece of broken glass under the translucent lights from where she was standing but as a technician she knew the shimmer was from code trapped inside a gem piece. She shuffled over with abounding curiosity and almost screamed at her own stupidity when she realized what it was: a piece of Steven's  _ old  _ gem. 

'Pink Diamond's gem.' She reminded herself.

She let out a nervous squeak and thought about Steven needing that piece in order to function somehow. After all every piece of a gem was critical no matter how small and this one, while only just a small sliver, was a piece of a Diamond. There was no telling what important data it held on it.

Wait. Why was she worried about this? It wasn't like they were using the old gem. He had his own gem now.

Peridot looked in the compartment for the other pieces to find that they were all dull, resembling Earth's own gems, now that they had no code residing in them.

She placed the small piece inside of her own gem for safekeeping deciding that she'd be sure to examine both Diaspore gems as thoroughly as possible when they woke up again.

She felt Lapis's hands on her shoulders and resisted the urge to just lean back. They had work to do and this was no time to feel safe. Unfortunately Lapis being anywhere around her just had that effect on her for some reason.

___________________________________________

Lapis turned Peridot around silently reveling in the way her hand felt in the smaller gems' and glanced at their current companions. Thankfully Jasper was already up and waiting impatiently for them at the warp pad with Bismuth, both Steven's curled up in their respective arms.

She groaned when she realized that she'd have to spend even  _ more _ time with the tall quartz as they explained what happened. Allowing her wings to flutter in agitation only once; she steeled herself for what was to come and pulled Peridot along as she went towards the warp pad.

If any other gem realized she was pointedly ignoring Jasper and the other gem scoffed in agitation as they waited for the warp to envelop them none of them said anything.

___________________________________________

Pearl was pacing in the living room as the Diamonds, all of whom were shrunken down to appropriate human size, Connie, and her parents all sat on the couch stewing with worry.

The blanket that Ruby had destroyed was promptly thrown in the trash and the ice was removed by Blue in order to make room for all of the gems in such a small space.

Ruby and Sapphire were sitting on the floor next to the adult Mahashwarren's feet and Amethyst had opted to sit near Spinel on the other side of the floor next to Blue's feet.

Gregg was pacing opposite to Pearl. They reminded Amethyst and Connie of an obstacle from a video game that you had to dodge twice in order to win.

Everyone in the room jumped when the door slammed open and Lars ran through immediately followed by an Emerald along with the cool kids and Sadie. All of whom questioned where Steven was and if he was okay.

"We don't know. He ran out of here in such a hurry and then we called Gregg and Connie to come help." Pearl frantically started, "Then the Diamonds showed up when we all felt… when he…" Tears streamed down her face as she thought about what all of the gems had felt and what it meant but couldn't bring herself to say it.

"He shattered didn't he." Lars said for her.

Pearl nodded as guilt wracked her body. 

She was supposed to protect him. She was supposed to be there for him but she wasn't. They barely even spoke anymore and when they did he seemed like he hated her for some reason. She told herself that it was just him being a teenager, as Gregg had said, but it didn't feel like that because it wasn't _ just  _ directed at her. It seemed like he was like that with all of the Crystal Gems sometimes. 

It felt like one part of him was his normal happy and bubbly self, wanting to interact with each and every person while the other half was more reserved but constantly angry at the world.

"Emerald and I felt it when we were fused as Emar… Do you know where he is or what even happened?" He asked, trying to carry on the conversation for her while fighting back tears of his own.

Pearl shook her head no as Amethyst screamed in frustration.

Hours passed as each person or gem found a new way to busy themselves hoping that  _ anyone  _ would come in and explain. All of them wanted to go look for him but with all of the warp pads activated and Steven's foul mood swings none of them knew where to look first so they just sat. Waiting and hoping for what they knew to be true to somehow be wrong.

"Well maybe he doesn't use the warp to get home. I mean he could just walk here right? I think I'll go outside just in case." Gregg said eventually, the air of sadness getting too much for him.

"I think we'll join you." Priyanka replied with her husband's hand held in her own.

The adults went outside who were quickly followed by Connie then Lars and Emerald who claimed they were better waiting outside anyway.

___________________________________________

Bismuth wasn't sure what time it was when they saw the inside of Steven's home, opting to put the boys in their bed before anything else, but knew they were all in trouble when they came face to face with not only the distraught A-team Crystal Gems but the Diamond's as well.

Everything seemed to move in slow motion for Bismuth as Pearl caught sight of Coeus in her arms.

"Oh my stars, Steven!!" Pearl grabbed at the boy and checked him.

Bismuth gingerly walked off of the platform and more into the room careful to still be in Pearl's reach. She listened for Jasper to follow her but it was obvious Pearl hadn't registered the other gems' presence yet.

Everyone on the couch moved to allow Steven to be placed on the couch. 

"Now Pearl everything is fine. We just need to get them up to their room and wait for Peri to get back with some equipment." Replied opting to keep her version of Steven in her arms.

"What on Earth are you talking about Bismuth? Why does Peridot need to get equipment?"

The sound of the warp sounded again as Peridot and Lapis had gone to Little Homeworld as promised.

Pearl started to usher her upstairs to Steven's room just as the door opened with Gregg and the Mahashwarrens filing back inside to stave off the cold before Bismuth had the chance to explain. 

___________________________________________

"Schtu-ball?! Why is his hair different and why is he so tall? Why is Jasper the one holding him?" Gregg asked with his eyes locked on the giant quartz who was standing awkwardly in the middle of the room.

"Gregg what are you talking about?" She asked, twirling around on the step to question the human. 

"Steven's right here in Bismuth arms." She calmly patted Bismuth's arm for good measure with a timid smile on her face.

"He's fiii-" Her eyes focused on where Gregg was looking, to Jasper holding something quite similar to Steven's own current stature with a flip flop dangling from his left foot. 

"Steven?! But he's… and-" Pearl stopped.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BABY?!" She screamed as she marched her way to Jasper only to pause halfway there to stare at the Steven in Bismuth's arms.

___________________________________________

Connie jumped when she heard Pearl's shriek of rage filled terror and she was pretty sure she wasn't the only one to do so.

Her gaze caught onto a boy curled up in Jasper's arms with curly brown hair that made her think it was somehow a younger version of Mr. Universe until she saw the dark pink flip flop dangling from the boy's foot.

She gasped and tears welled in her eyes when she realized it was  _ Steven  _ in her arms. Following Pearl's own gaze she saw yet another Steven in Bismuth's arms. This one had the curly black locks she had grown so used to that may or may not have been a part of a few dreams of hers.

"Why are they separated?" Her fears overwhelming her voice as she whispered out her question.

"Connie-"

"No! Bismuth you don't  _ understand  _ Steven  _ needs  _ his gem! Without it… without it he'll- …he'll-"

Flashbacks of an almost dead Steven flowed through her mind. The sound of his barely there voice begging for his gem back was all she could hear as the world spinned around her. He could only go a couple minutes without his gem and now… now it had been  _ hours  _ since anyone had last seen him. Why was everyone so calm?! Was he even-

"-nnie. -the. …Kahani breathe…" She heard someone say.

"That's it… in and out just like that."

She wasn't sure who was talking but they were holding her head still. Why were they holding her still? Didn't they understand she needed to  _ see  _ him?

Her head became fuzzy as her thoughts spun out of control and her lungs seemed to absolutely refuse to fill with air so she tried harder only to not make a difference at all.

"No no no just look at me. Deep breaths for me. Focus on mom okay? Focus on my voice. Deep breaths. It's alright. Steven's alright sweetheart. Your dad and Pearl already checked Steven's vitals okay? He's alright. Deep breaths now."

He was okay? No, no he couldn't be okay. He wasn't  _ okay _ because there were  _ two _ of him. There couldn't… 

"Kahani listen to me you're having a panic attack okay? Now I need you to breathe with me. Come on I know you can do it. You know how to do this."

Panic attack? She was having a panic attack? But she hadn't had one of those in years since, for her at least, they were caused by extreme stress or overthinking and she hadn't… oh… 

Connie followed her mother's breathing enough to get herself back to normal under her father's worried gaze. After she was okay she looked around the room once more to find that both Steven's were no longer in the room.

"Bismuth and Jasper brought them upstairs. Don't worry, Pearl and Gregg are with them. Oh and we'll be staying until I determine that they're healthy. I only did a quick look at their vitals earlier." 

She nodded at her mother's words, only halfway listening as the world was still trying to right itself. Somehow she managed to get to the couch. She didn't remember how exactly but she could feel the cushions underneath her all warm and comfy, beckoning her to sleep.

___________________________________________

Polus woke up to a soft light being cast onto his face and a heavy weight across his waist. Peeking an eye open he realized the moon was shining from behind the curtains and that Coeus's arm was the thing laying on him. 

He took a moment to watch his human half enjoying his slumber before gently removing the arm to sit up. He hadn't realized neither of them had shrunken back down in their sleep until he smoothed his hair out from the awkward single poof on his head, frowning momentarily when he realized it gave him three bits of poofy bangs instead. Pausing to look at the mirror in their room he noticed that neither of them were actually pink and instead had retained their human appearance. 

'I have the same hair color as Gregg. Oh the irony.' He thought as he ducked under the door frame to actually leave the room.

Polus made his way down the stairs to the kitchen, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes along the way, and saw Pearl already at the stove with a timid smile on her face. He wrinkled his nose when he saw Amethyst on top of the counter put a whole egg in her mouth after grabbing it out of the carton beside her.

"Oh, you're awake! That's good… um…" Pearl started twisting her hands in her shirt as she nervously talked.

**"Polus."** He answered back, realizing where he got his own nervous habits from.

"Right, and St- sorry …Coeus… is?"

Polus felt a tinge of annoyance course through him when she spoke the name that only  _ he  _ called his other half. He had half a mind to correct her about it,  _ politely _ , when an unexpected yawn came out instead and stilled, trying to remember human versus gem etiquette on such things. Pearl had always told them to cover their mouth as Steven but he never understood why. Whereas Coeus had just picked up the habit and never questioned her.

**"Still sleeping."** He decided to reply after a few heartbeats. He'd correct her on the name thing later when Coeus was with him to actively remind him to be kind about it.

"Dude what are those in your mouth?!" Amethyst yelled at him with an egg in her own.

"Amethyst please!" Pearl turned slightly to scream at her, "You're going to make him not want to talk to us, and don't talk when you're eating!"

Polus honestly wasn't sure what Amethyst was talking about so he did the only sensible thing and felt inside his mouth for his teeth. Maybe he forgot to reform one? His confusion only increased after he found that his teeth were all there. 

"Oh dear." Pearl said when she saw the confusion on Polus's face and Amethyst's shock and knew she was in for a battle this time.

"It seems that your fangs have grown back out. We'll have to file them down again it seems. Oh well, this'll only take a few minutes." 

Polus got annoyed when a metal nail file came out of Pearl's gem. He was  **not** going to go through this annoying ritual now that he didn't have to pretend he was completely human. He happened to  _ like _ his fangs. Sure they got annoying when he accidentally bit his lip repeatedly and drew blood but that was just part of it! Not to mention the fact that he didn't actually  _ have  _ blood anymore so really it was a non issue.

He glared at her as she came closer to him with the dreaded nail file, "Now Polus don't-" 

They both knew how this was going to go down before Pearl even finished the sentence as Polus bolted out the door as fast as possible. He could hear Pearl screeching at him to come back as he made more of his escape.

___________________________________________

Connie and the others had opted to go outside once more after Mr. Universe and Pearl had finally come down from watching Polus and Coeus sleep for exactly thirty minutes. Peridot had come back before they had come down and quickly explained what happened to them and reiterated multiple times that they were fine.

She was just about to ask Lars for a duel, who had apparently gotten rather good according to Emerald, when Polus came running out of the house with Pearl right on his heels and screaming at him.

"It's just a few minutes! You know that, now stop running!"

"No! You can't take my teeth!"

"Uh, does anyone know what's happening?" Connie asked no one in particular.

"Nope, but I've always had this theory that Pearl is the tooth fairy and I gotta say this is not helping me quell the idea." Lars replied.

"You thought that too?!" Jenny smacked his arm lightly as she replied.

"I could see it." The other potential adults agreed simultaneously.

___________________________________________

Pink Pearl was tending to her flowers in Greenhouse A in Little Homeworld when she heard  _ something _ . She didn't know what it was or how she knew but she knew it was important and that it was asking for help. She ignored the familiar tune of a piano at first in favor of tending to her plants. It was her assignment from Peridot after all. Although why she was being "taught" how to garden was beyond her. 

Didn't they know she already knew how? It was one of Pink's favorite pastimes after all. How many hours had she spent planting and tending to all those flowers in her Diamond's garden? Eons she supposed, but Pink was no longer here. The other gems of Earth had made that  _ abundantly  _ clear as they introduced The Steven to her but she wasn't fooled so easily. 

She knew that some part, the part she actually  _ liked _ , of Pink was inside of the human shell. 

Eventually, after being on this planet for a couple of months and thinking back on her memories now that they weren't clouded with adoration, she decided that there were two distinct versions of Pink Diamond: the one that gave her silly nicknames and laughed with her, who adored the other Diamonds and wanted to be just like them and the one that was always so angry that she couldn't control herself. 

The question was: which one of them was the one who fought for Earth? Had she just matured over the years and managed to teach herself control? Were they both bits and pieces of the other or were they so completely different that their only common interest  _ was _ saving the Earth?

She remembered often reporting to Blue about Pink's behavior and how she believed there were two of them but the other Diamond hadn't believed her. She was just a simple pearl so her concerns weren't interesting or wanted back then.

She had only  _ just  _ remembered the other half of their nickname game during the last few days after fusing with the renegade Pearl. Pink had often given her many nicknames, her favorite being Plum, and in turn Pearl had tried to give her Diamond a few but she was never good at it. 

Well, she  _ thought _ she hadn't been good at it until she had started listening to the humans call each other different names. Each one of them seemed to have a name different from the other and if they were similar it was because their unit made it a tradition. The mother human was often the one who gave the child their name but she had found that wasn't always the case. Sometimes friends gave each other new names. Is that what she had done the first time she came up with a nickname for Pink?

She let the memory fill her thoughts, ultimately distracting herself from her task, as an effort to dampen the pull of the strangely familiar tune of the piano. She remembered they were in Pink's room on Homeworld and had just finished a game of tag when she had suggested they play the word game. She wasn't sure which of them came up with it first but the game was simple: break gemsong down into letters to make new words then look them up in the library to see if they're  _ actually  _ new or if you were just remembering something you had read or heard.

Pearl had thought for a few minutes before she let her bell gemsong ring out in answer…

The song of the piano echoed in her head and unraveled her thoughts as she remembered why she knew it. 

She was sure it wasn't possible… 

It couldn't be...

___________________________________________

Polus was amused when he pulled up his dome shield to keep Coeus's Pearl away from him. He was honestly surprised it had worked, quickly noticing however that it looked…. odd. Gone where the bright pink shades he once knew. The dome itself was of a purple color now, like a plum.

'Isn't that ironic.' He thought as the Pearl screeched at him.

"Polus just come out! I promise it'll only take a few minutes!"

**"No! I like my fangs and you aren't taking them!"**

"I'm sorry what?!" Connie half-screamed to the others while trying to recall every time she had seen Steven's teeth.

"Did he just say fangs? As in like a vampire? I'm pretty sure I'd know if my son had fangs!" 

"Connie are you  _ sure  _ he's only half-gem and half-human?" 

Polus' attention shifted as Coeus woke up. It was odd being able to be in two places at once. He followed Coeus's line of site, having full faith in his shield, he grimaced when Coeus bit his lip on accident with one of his own fangs. He fought back a groan when the other noticed the bit of blood trickling down his lip and went straight for the bathroom, readjusting his height just before hitting the doorway. 

The cold feel of the metal nail file was quickly warmed up by Coeus's hands as he started to file down the first of his bottom two fangs. Taking the time to momentarily spit out the small particles of bone that fell after a few swipes only to repeat the process all over again. Curious Polus felt his own to see if they too were being destroyed only to make a pleased hum of gemsong when he found that they weren't.

Pearl banged on the dome again in agitation in a last attempt to get the Diamond out, huffing in annoyance when she seemed to realize he wasn't coming out. 

The soft chimes of a bell caught him off guard as they chimed in the wind. He turned in disbelief to the owner, words caught in his throat as he stared at her through his dome shield.

"Hello Polus."

___________________________________________

Coeus frowned once more as he realized he couldn't fix his top two fangs. He knew they always gave him trouble but he was sixteen now! He shouldn't need Pearl's help for this. Sighing in defeat he found one of Connie's old ponytail holders that had gotten left somehow and twisted it up in his own hair. He knew it wasn't much of a ponytail but he wasn't used to the feel of his hair on his neck. 

It felt too much like bugs crawling on him and that just made him think of how he felt just before shattering themselves. He still couldn't believe it, how  _ good _ it felt to just be them. It was odd too because they knew that they were separate beings but they still felt connected. If anything they somehow felt more connected now than they had as Steven and that… 

He wasn't sure how to feel about that. 

He sent a quick clip of gemsong to Polus as a greeting, concerned when his other half sent back utter annoyance. His piano keys played sharp and out of tune, like a child was just mashing the buttons down to copy the person actually playing.

**((What's wrong?))** He sent back as a light riff.

**((Your Pearl is annoying me.))**

**((Oh come on, you know she's not** **_my_ ** **Pearl.))**

**((Fine. The Pearl that raised you and is arguably more attached to your presence than mine is annoying me…))**

**((Ha ha.))**

Coeus tuned out his other-halfs' grumbles about Pearl resembling a bird, trying to not give the other the satisfaction of having an audience, to focus on finding another holder for Polus's hair.

'Really need to come up with a better term than other-half or gem. It's not exactly accurate anymore. Not to mention annoying.' He thought idly as he put the ponytail holder onto his right wrist.

'Guess I'll have to ask Pearl to fix the top two.' He resigned to himself before exiting the bathroom door.

___________________________________________

**"Plum? What are you doing here?"** Polus asked the cracked Pearl on the other side of the barrier.

"You called me silly. Well, I wasn't sure at first if it was you or-" The gem started wringing her hands in her skirt, unsure of how to continue.

She focused on the rough feel of it in order to calm her thoughts knowing that whatever happened next wouldn't be good. Polus always hated it when he was out and she mentioned Pink accidentally. 

**"Pink."** The word spat out of the Diamond's mouth with so much hate that it was palpable.

___________________________________________

"Hey Mom, my fangs came back in for some reason. I already got the bottom two taken care of but I think I need help getting the top two. Um what're you doing?" 

"Oh St- Coeus, sorry I'll get used to it eventually," 

Coeus tensed at the wave of absolute jealousy that Polus sent him as his mom called his name. He knew he should say something about it but he figured making sure Polus didn't murder his mother was more important when a feral growl emerged from Polus's lips as Pearl slammed her hands on the dome once more in agitation.

**((Why are you in a shield?))**

**((She's trying to file down my fangs.))**

**((This is an issue because...?))**

**((I** **_like_ ** **my fangs.))** The gem sang with a pout.

Coeus frowned at this as he walked closer to the dome making sure to keep the laugh he felt bubbling up at the others' childishness inside of him.

**((They remind me that I'm** **_me.))_ ** The other replied after a few moments in a barely there twinkling of keys.

A dark purple shield plate formed under Coeus's feet as he thought on the others' words. His heart stutters when he loses balance as the plate rises in the air only for sides to instantaneously form around him making it seem like he's in a giant prism bowl. He lets his right side lean against it as the top piece of the dome makes an opening for him.

'It makes sense.' He thought to himself, unsure if the other could hear him.

He thought about how Polus had never really been given a choice on anything. He had always been Rose or Steven, just going along with whatever they wanted and digging his heels into the ground when he didn't only to be steamrolled by the other because what  _ he  _ wanted didn't matter. 

Guilt curled up in his stomach as the prism bowl dematerialized, making him stand in front of the other in the dome.

He wasn't sure what to say to the other. Choosing to bite his bottom lip instead and cast a glance at the gem expecting him to be agitated. Polus on the other hand was twisting his shirt up, which happened to be a nervous tic he recognized from Pearl doing it so much, and subsequently sneaking glares in at Pearl while glancing back at him looking like he was a little kid about to be scolded. 

"Okay." Coeus let out with a sigh, unsure of how else to answer.

He couldn't help but laugh when Polus started wiggling like he's a dog that was waiting impatiently for a treat with a pure look of adoration on his face. 

The dome was put down after a few more minutes of coaxing and Coeus explaining that Polus wouldn't be needing his teeth filed down. Which only had Pearl giving an indignant huff when Plum hummed at her like she was about to give a lecture on Pearl-gem etiquette.

"I just don't understand why you would want to encourage this  _ childish _ behavior Steven! I mean honestly shouldn't he be  _ wanting _ to fit in with humans?" Pearl's hands went up in exasperation while she was circling the duo for the fifth time. 

"Except that he's not a human Pearl he's a-" 

"-Diamond!" 

Coeus froze when he heard the elegant voice of his Nana cutting him off like it was nothing. The sharp flare of agitation sent from Polus was becoming as easy to expect as it was to breathe at this point. Which was saying… alot.

**((Are you ever** **_not_ ** **angry?))**

**((Only when I'm sleeping.))**

"Oh this is wonderful! Now one of you can stay here on Earth and the other can come back to Homeworld with us!"

**"No."** The new Diamond's voice rang out in such a commanding tone that even White blinked in surprise.

"But Pi- …hm, well no I suppose you're completely new now aren't you? You certainly  _ look _ new."

White tutted at them like they were show dogs. Having them twirl around every which way and reveal their new gems in an impromptu fashion. Polus outright refused to move at her twirling fingers and commanding smile, digging his feet into the ground when White hummed in disapproval. While Coeus just pulled up his shirt and grinned when he was met with their coos of approval. 

White then hummed in what Coeus perceived as ripe dissatisfaction at the new Diamond's display of rebellion. No doubt the eldest was already contemplating what sort of heinous things the spawn of Pink could come up with while sitting on his new throne. All of which would very obviously be organic friendly and within Steven's Era 3 rules but bent to fit his own demands. Then again it was always hard for Coeus to determine what she was thinking especially while she was on Earth.

Blue on the other hand was looking at them, more precisely Polus, Coeus had thought to himself, like she had when, as Steven, they had explained that Pink's gem wasn't gone. Like she had gotten a piece of her sister back and all she wanted to do was coddle it.

Yellow was somehow the easiest to handle. Her gaze was fair and precise like she knew exactly what the two of them were capable of even if they didn't and she expected great things from both of them. Coeus couldn't help but wonder how many times his mother had seen that same gaze turn sour when she hadn't lived up to the elders' expectations.

The way they were looking at them made him think of what their titles would be if they had ever been given any like queens in a distant land. He imagined White would be "Mother of the World" for her old title and her new one would only be "The Uncertain" or maybe "The Hopeful" given the context. 

Yellow would have been "The Just" and now "The Corrector" or "The Healer" if it were in human terms maybe even "The Grounded" considering how easy the gems under her command on Homeworld seemed to speak to her now.

Blue… well he already knew gems had called her "The Shatterer" but he supposed the more human term for her would have been "Matriarch of Death." Now he thought she fit more with "Consul of Emotions" but he wasn't sure what it all meant. Blue's new power made him uneasy whenever she tried to use it on him. 

He wasn't sure what his own title would be. Although he supposed that  _ he  _ wouldn't actually have a title. Steven would have, or Polus would but Coeus himself wasn't a Diamond. He was still a half gem hybrid sure but his gem half was now… well a Pearl and Pearls didn't get titles or recognition. Not that it mattered since the title he personally would want to go by, since the others were always going on about ruling and whatnot, would be "Curator of Peace." 

There were too many to think of for Pink, Rose, whatever you wanted to call her. It didn't help that he didn't particularly  _ like _ thinking about her. Doing so always made his head spin with worry and thoughts that questioned his very existence. He still wasn't completely sure that she had made him just so that he could live the life she couldn't. No matter how many new memories he made there was always a tiny part of him, that seemed to be getting bigger each day, that thought he was made to just  _ fix _ her mistakes and after that… 

He wasn't sure what he thought would happen after his "purpose" on Earth was done with. Especially since it had actually happened: the war was over, the gems were happy and no longer corrupted, colonization had been stopped dead in its tracks, and the Diamonds knew the truth whether they wanted to actually accept it or not. 

When he was younger he had always thought that the second he managed to fix everything Pink would somehow come back and claim all the glory or atleast claim Little Homeworld as her own and kick him out. At the time he wasn't sure what he would do if it happened but now… now he had the Dondai and could just leave. 

He likes to think he'd keep in contact with Connie, but knows that that would only happen under better circumstances like if  _ he  _ had chosen to leave. Otherwise he'd more than likely just turn his phone off and ignore any incoming messages. Even as Steven he'd always had the best intentions but horrible follow through. As for the Little Homeworld gems he wouldn't expect any of them to follow him anywhere. Earth was their home and they didn't have a leader anymore and he was fine with that. 

He liked to think that Peridot and Lapis would try to follow him though since neither of them had any ties to Pink or Rose as a whole. He wasn't sure what Amethyst, Garnet, Bismuth or Pearl would do. In a perfect world he'd say that they'd follow him or even make the previous Diamond leave herself but in reality he knew his meager sixteen years of life with them didn't hold a candle to the five thousand plus years they respectively had with her. 

Jasper would more than likely at least  _ try  _ to follow him if only because Polus would be in the passenger seat grumbling out insults about whomever decided to stay and for that same reason he imagined Volleyball/Plum would be right there with her since they both seemed to favor Polus. That is if Jasper's watchful eyes and Plum's insistence for them to play was any indication as the Pearl was currently holding Polus's other hand and swinging it back and forth like they were about to jump in imaginary puddles with Jasper yelling at them to not catch an organic illness.

Honestly the only ones who he was certain where their stances were would be the elder Diamonds and his father. Both of which would be on opposite ends with the other Diamonds favoring Pink and his father favoring him and Polus, or atleast him. Was that why Polus now looked like his, their, father? To try to make the elder human care for him or to look less like Pink?

"Oh Steven, you shouldn't even have to worry about that. Of course we love and would choose you! I mean honestly if Rose did come back somehow, well first I'd make sure that you were okay and if not then I'd threaten to shatter someone, BUT AFTER THAT I wouldn't feel comfortable with her staying with us anyway. Especially if it made you uncomfortable. She may have been my Diamond but  _ you  _ are my son and I don't care if you get to be two thousand four hundred and fifty-seven years old there are two things that I know for certain when it comes to you: The first is that I'll always be older and therefore you'll always be my baby and the second is that you're never allowed to get a face tattoo of any kind. Seriously Steven they're horrible."

"Well Pearl, it's not really… that simple."

What…

"WHAT ON HOMEWORLD AND EARTH DO YOU MEAN IT'S NOT THAT SIMPLE GREG?! OF COURSE IT IS!!" 

Coeus hadn't realized he had said all of his worries out loud until his father spoke and he was fairly positive that in all of his life he had  _ never  _ seen his Pearl get this upset over anything. …Besides the times he had almost died of course. 

If he didn't know any better he was sure his mom was about to shapeshift some wings and start packing his father's eyes out with her nose somehow.

"Yes Greg,  _ please elaborate _ ." Mr. Maheswaran held his wife's arm with a steady hand before she was able to move any further towards the other man.

Coeus was still trying to figure out when the others had gotten near them while the conversation continued. The only thing grounding him was Polus's almost bone crushing grip in his hand.

"Well I just mean that he's an adult now. It's not like he needs us anymore so… I mean I was around his age when I left my parents." 

"He is  **not** … I don't even…" Dr. Maheswaran took a deep breath and grounded her thoughts before deciding the best course of action, "Doug there is a metal baseball bat hidden under the back seat of the car and I need it. No, wait… Connie, your sword can cut people, right honey?" 

"Okay no one is cutting or hitting anyone. Let's just all take a nice deep breath and calm down before someone says anything else completely horrible." 

Bismuth moved herself in between Pearl and the elder human before she could do anything drastic and picked up the much thinner gem. Effectively holding her in place while her legs kicked in the air. 

Coeus was frozen in place, feeling like his heart has stopped while Polus's gemsong sounded like pure static that has the other Diamonds flinching for some reason.

"Bismuth put me down right now! I am gonna…"

"Get 'em P!!"

"Look it's not like I don't love him  _ okay _ . It's just… well you can't tell me that none of you have thought about what it would be like to have them both. I just… You guys wouldn't understand because you're not human but believe me when I say it's completely normal for a kid his age to leave home and if that's what he thinks he would have to do if she came back then..."

"Okay Mr. Universe I'm gonna step in so that the other adults don't completely murder you right now, okay. You're being completely delusional, a horrible human being, not to mention a terrible father right now. Speaking as a teenager, if my dad decided that he'd rather have my previously dead mom who somehow came back to life around than me or Kiki then I'd probably burn the restaurant down for the sole fact that she'd be some kind of weird zombie. No offense Lars. But that's creepy."

"It's cool. Since we're being honest I'd probably help you."

"What? No that's not what I'm-"

"Nuh uh, you don't get to defend yourself right now. Shush."

"...I just meant-"

"I SAID SHUSH!"

Coeus was doing everything he could to  **not** pay attention to the conversation happening around him. To the point that he was actually willing to let his brain translate the absolute filth coming out of Polus's gem, some of which he wasn't even sure what the words meant or that they were even human words at all. 

He faintly registered that Jenny was suddenly kneeling in front of him with a big smile on her face and hands on his shoulders through his tears that had been steadily flowing out. 

"Well I for one know a good shopping trip always made me feel better. What do ya say we go tomorrow? We can have the other boys carry our bags and Sadie and Connie can come. We could also make fun of the adults, and by adults I mean the inorganic ones unless Connie's parents want to come with, when they don't understand a pop culture reference on something we want to get."

Coeus opened his mouth to answer only to close it, afraid that anything that came out would just be a blubbering mess. He felt Polus tap his hip with his own and heard his staticky cursing lessen only enough for a small yes to escape his mouth in affirmation for both of them.

"Steven please, or would you prefer Coeus? Is that it? Do you not like Steven anymore because it's fine if you don't. Just… let me explain. It's not that I don't love you it's just… I wasn't ready okay and now you don't need me anymore. I'm not saying I'd choose your mother over you because I… I wouldn't, okay. It's just I know how you feel about Rose so if you felt like you needed to see the sights every now and then if she were alive again and you still didn't like her then that'd be okay."

**"You hesitated."**

As the minutes ticked on Polus's gem slowly went from cursing to a nice lullaby type tune. He even leant his head down to his other half's neck and nuzzled as he had seen humans do sometimes hoping that it was a comforting sort of gesture as Jenny took roll call of who all would be joining them glaring at Greg until he decided to leave after handing her a wad of cash for use.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So just to clarify Greg isn't seeing Steven/Coeus leaving as an either/or situation like the others are, which he ends up explaining a little to late?
> 
> Please don't hate me.
> 
> Comment either way!!  
> ____________________________  
> The author: has a plan and meant for it to happen.  
> Pink Pearl: Exists  
> Author: Wha- How did you get in here??  
> Pink Pearl: Give me a story.  
> Author: ...Fine but I don't know what you want from me.  
> ____________________________
> 
> Also the author: Went in not meaning for Polus to be a sort of split personality type deal with Rose  
> Pink Pearl: Joke's on you!!!

**Author's Note:**

> The gem Steven becomes, Diaspore, is known as two names when you want to buy it: Csarite and Zultanite, but they're the same gem and aren't actually magnetic so I took some liberties.
> 
> Hope y'all enjoy! Be sure to leave a comment if you wanna!!


End file.
